Guide to FOGO: The Fear of Going Out
Remember the common phrase, “fear of missing out,” or FOMO? This anxiety surrounding not going out on a Saturday night or attending a birthday party was almost eliminated once COVID-19 restrictions required us to stay inside. Yet, as quarantine restrictions were lifted and vaccines rolled out, some individuals started to experience a whole new syndrome — FOGO, or “fear of going out.”
While many people have resumed their social lives, others are still experiencing FOGO years after the lockdown ended. If you or a loved one is uncomfortable with the idea of leaving home and socializing in public, this guide may help. Read on to discover coping methods, how FOGO can lead to agoraphobia, and whether it’s time to seek treatment.
What Is FOGO?
FOGO refers to the anxieties and stress individuals started to experience as the world returned to normal, with people being able to go out in public again. These feelings are also known as reentry anxiety or social anxiety after COVID-19.
At the peak of the pandemic, we’d all been cooped up inside for over a year. With time to enjoy the comfort of our space without socializing or going out in public, venturing into social situations lost its appeal for many. For some, the thought of doing so might have even felt overwhelming — it may still be distressing to them. Those experiencing FOGO may have preferred staying inside before the lockdown, whereas others may have found a new appreciation for the comfort of their own home.
If you are currently experiencing FOGO, you’re not alone. Many Americans started seeking treatment for anxiety or depression during the pandemic. According to the American Psychological Association’s COVID-19 survey in 2020, 74% of psychologists reported an increase in treatment provided for anxiety disorders, and 60% saw an increase in depressive disorder treatment. In a 2024 poll from the American Psychiatric Association, 43% of adults said they felt more anxious than in 2023. Today, anxiety in public places is a syndrome that many can relate to.
7 Tips for Coping With FOGO
Are you seeking tips for social anxiety and ways to combat a fear of leaving the house? These seven methods may help ease worries about entering public settings again, either for yourself or a friend or family member.
1. Note Your Fears and Have an Affirmation
When you encounter a situation that makes you feel nervous or anxious, you may take it as a sign you shouldn’t move forward with the activity. However, this feeling may actually be associated with the fact that this experience is new and unfamiliar.
It’s helpful to write down your fears of going outside to attempt to understand them and move past these emotions. Noting situations that make you feel unsafe or uncomfortable allows you to visually evaluate them and process how and why they make you feel that way.
After considering your response to leaving the house, go through your list, think about the accuracy of those fears, and question them. It can be easier for a person to jump to the worst conclusion than to believe things will be all right once they’re out socializing.
What many say to themselves when they’re fearful of a social situation is, “I won’t have a good time if I go to this event,” or “I’ll panic if I go out to this party and people will judge me.” Once you identify your fears, you can counteract them with thoughts such as, “There is a chance I’ll have fun while I’m out.”
It can also help to have a positive affirmation to repeat to yourself in social environments that make you uncomfortable. An affirmation may help ease your worries and remind you why you’re out in the first place. Something simple like, “I’m here to enjoy myself and have fun,” may change your mood and thoughts about going out in public.
2. Decide the Amount of Risk You’re Willing to Take
While venues such as bars, restaurants, festivals, museums, and other establishments have been back in full swing for a couple of years, you might feel anxious partaking in activities you used to enjoy. Some might cause you more stress than others, and it’s helpful to recognize which activity you’re willing to try while experiencing prolonged FOGO.
To help prepare yourself for entering a public setting, you can list the risks you’re willing to take to ease yourself into social situations. An example of this method can include knowing you’re not ready to hang out at a bar but are willing to meet up at a cafe or restaurant with a friend. Trying these activities first may help you realize that leaving your house can result in a fun and enjoyable time.
3. Take It Slow
Once you start feeling better about going out in settings such as coffee dates, try tackling activities that initially felt too risky, like attending large gatherings. A tip for coping with anxiety in public is to slowly ease back into these social situations, setting realistic goals to help yourself gradually get back into practice. For example, instead of immediately going to a large birthday party with friends, acquaintances, and strangers, try getting together with a small group of close friends and going to a park.
After attempting exposure therapy, you can branch out and challenge yourself to enjoy different public places with more people. You can continue to set goals to help you conquer your fears. For example, you can have a goal of eventually attending an outdoor concert for your favorite band and work to achieve this. Your body may not recognize it now, but slowly pushing yourself to try going out in public may eventually benefit your physical, mental, and social well-being.
4. Visualize a Positive Experience
You might have heard of the idea of thinking something into existence or manifesting your desires or goals. These types of actions may help you have a good experience when you leave your home to attend a social gathering and cope with FOGO.
Take a moment, and instead of imagining the worst outcome, think about how enjoyable the outing may be. Visualize yourself smiling, having fun with your friends, and feeling relieved to finally enjoy being out and about. Flooding your mind with these positive thoughts may help shift your perspective on leaving the house and help you find ways to manage your anxiety in social situations.
5. Practice Breathing Exercises
If you’re out and begin to feel anxious or like you’re going to have a panic attack, your breathing pattern may be the first thing you notice. A physical symptom people experience is shortness of breath or hyperventilation — going through this in public can be very distressing. It may even reinforce someone’s fear about leaving the house.
Fortunately, learning breathing exercises can help you feel prepared to enter public places. These exercises can slow your breathing and bring feelings of relaxation to the forefront. They can also prevent other symptoms from escalating, like chest pain or increased heart rate. You can practice techniques such as lengthening your exhale or focusing on your breath every morning, afternoon, or evening to relax and feel comfortable using these methods.
6. Practice Mindfulness
Anxiety and panic attacks may sometimes bring up negative thoughts or perceptions driven by your fears. Your symptoms may become intense and frighten you to the point where you think you’re losing control or something bad will happen to you, especially when you’re in public.
You can gain control of these thoughts and feelings by increasing your awareness of what you are thinking. One way to do so is to learn to practice mindfulness. Using this method may help you recognize your emotions and thoughts before they control your behaviors. Being self-aware can help you remind yourself that you’re going to be OK when you feel overwhelmed.
Once you have this awareness, you can also practice opposite thinking, which involves reframing negative thoughts. Whenever you notice a negative thought, replace it with its opposite or a more realistic outlook. Let’s say you think to yourself, “I will always fear large gatherings.” Reframe these with, “I am strong enough to work through this fear.” To take this further, merge this method with visualizing a positive experience. Imagine yourself shopping for groceries or taking public transport while feeling calm.
7. Have a Plan in Place
Another method to evaluate your anxieties about going out is to question what is holding you back from having fun outside your home. Discovering the inner obstacle preventing you from enjoying life again can allow you to think of solutions to overcome this barrier.
For example, if you are concerned that you’ll feel anxious when you’re out, plan to call a family member to help ease the situation. Or, if you’re worried about dealing with a panic attack alone, venture out with a friend you trust. Having a support system during challenging moments may help you feel more comfortable in public.
Before going out, you can also communicate with your loved ones about your feelings and fears. Together, you and those closest to you can create a plan to recognize your symptoms and try some of the above coping strategies. This can include knowing when it’s best to head back home.
What Is Agoraphobia?
While agoraphobia is often oversimplified as a fear of leaving the house, it is actually the fear of being in unfamiliar situations or in open places. This phobia is often also accompanied by panic attacks.
People with the condition feel intense anxiety about being in scenarios they feel are difficult to escape, like being in a crowd, standing in line, or where help isn’t easily accessible. Other places they may find uncomfortable include:
- Shopping malls
- Public transportation
- Concerts and shows
Those experiencing agoraphobia are afraid of leaving environments they view as safe, which are typically their homes. Avoiding public places might feel like the only way to prevent feelings of anxiety or panic attacks. As a result, FOGO — a type of social anxiety often triggered by being in public spaces — may coexist with or lead to agoraphobia.
What Causes Agoraphobia?
People develop a phobia of going outside for many reasons, such as having experienced:
- A panic attack in public led to the fear that it may happen again.
- Recurrent panic attacks, known as a panic disorder.
- Traumatic events, like being in an accident or the death of a loved one.
- Previous mental health challenges.
- Substance misuse.
- An unhappy or toxic relationship.
In most cases, a combination of the above and other factors causes agoraphobia.
Symptoms of Agoraphobia
When a person is in an uncomfortable situation and starts to feel like they’re going to have a panic attack, they may experience physical, behavioral, and cognitive symptoms.
Physical symptoms of agoraphobia may include:
- Increased heart rate
- Chest pain
- Hyperventilation or rapid breathing
- Feeling hot
- Trouble swallowing
- High blood pressure
- Feeling dizzy
- Feeling sick
- Ringing in ears
Behavioral symptoms of agoraphobia may include:
- Avoiding public places or situations where they have to leave their home.
- Only going places with someone they trust.
- Not leaving their home for an extended amount of time.
- Avoid going places that are far away from their home.
Cognitive symptoms of agoraphobia may include:
- Feeling like a panic attack is life-threatening.
- Thinking others will judge them for having a panic attack in public.
- Feeling like they may lose control in a public place.
- Thinking they may not be able to escape the situation if they have a panic attack.
The severity of these symptoms depends on the individual.
Treatments for Agoraphobia
For those experiencing symptoms of agoraphobia, speaking with a licensed professional about therapy is important.
For example, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can be an effective way to deal with the anxiety caused by agoraphobia and FOGO. CBT focuses on changing how you perceive and respond to scenarios by reframing negative thoughts. Let’s say you avoid leaving the house because you believe you will have a panic attack if you do — CBT can help you examine your feelings and reactions, change your thought patterns, and allow you to develop healthy coping skills.
In addition to counseling, lifestyle changes such as eating a healthier diet, engaging in regular exercise, avoiding substances like alcohol or drugs, and avoiding caffeinated beverages may help treat agoraphobia. Like the seven methods discussed in this guide, self-help techniques can also ease panic attacks.
If you or a loved one still experiences strong symptoms of agoraphobia after therapy, implementing lifestyle changes, and using self-help techniques, a professional may recommend medication.
Seek Support From a Professional Counselor
The fear of leaving your house may be hindering your social, mental, and physical health. If you’re looking for ways to cope with FOGO or agoraphobia, Merrimack Valley Psychological Associates is here to support you. While dealing with these conditions can feel overwhelming, our compassionate and licensed counselors can provide resources, strategies, and treatments to help you overcome your fears.
To schedule an appointment with one of our professional counselors, contact us today!
Reviewed By
Dr. David Rainen, PsyD.
I am a licensed clinical psychologist with an extensive background treating a variety of different ages, situations, emotional and mental health disorders in individuals and their families. As part of my 10 year professional and training career in psychology, I have developed and refined my skills and approaches through my work in a variety of diverse settings including: hospitals, community outpatient facilities, college counseling centers, secure and unsecure inpatient/residential treatment programs, and therapeutic day schools.