How to Tell Loved Ones About Mental Health Challenges

It’s good to know you have a trusted friend or family member on your side when you’re struggling with something, whether that’s depression, anxiety or another personal issue. While it can feel intimidating to open up initially, your loved ones will appreciate you turning to them. Expressing struggles weighing on your mind can help them understand you better and provide support in tough times.

Here are a few tips for talking about mental health to start the dialogue.

1. Be Patient With Yourself

Maybe you’re not ready to discuss the details or extent of your challenges. That’s completely okay. Give yourself time and know that it’s all right not to know how to describe your mental health situation right away. Be patient and kind to yourself by admitting to yourself that you need and deserve support.

You might tell your loved ones that you’re struggling but unsure how to talk about it. Tell them that you will open up more when you’re better able to express yourself. You might have them check on you now and then to ensure you’re okay rather than discussing your issue.

Talking to someone can also be a nice distraction from what you’re going through. You’ll feel less isolated and find your words soon enough. Additionally, your loved ones will appreciate you looping them in so they know when or how to help.

2. Resist Stigmatizing Yourself

Sometimes people avoid discussing feelings because they fear the stigma of a diagnosis or how it could affect their identity. But whether you are diagnosed or not, conditions like depression and anxiety can weigh heavily on you. By sharing your struggles, you might receive options to get you started on the recovery path to prevent the condition from worsening.

Further, any negative feelings you might be experiencing, like hopelessness, are a reflection of the mental illness and do not reflect the reality that there is hope in getting help.

Understand that a mental health diagnosis is not a sign of weakness or failure. These are real conditions that can be managed so you can start feeling better. Specific treatments can help relieve symptoms and empower you to manage them in the long run. Sometimes the stigma of a mental illness can be just debilitating as the symptoms — be kind to yourself and know that you are still the same person deserving of support and a better life.

3. Write Your Feelings Down

It can be overwhelming knowing how to describe your mental health situation to someone. You might fear judgment or feel vulnerable discussing personal issues with others. If you’re unsure how to tell someone about your mental health, come up with ideas for the discussion and write down what you will say beforehand. That way, you can communicate clearly and gather your thoughts about the direction you’d like to conversation to go in.

Also, some people find it easier to write their feelings down than talk to someone face-to-face. Whether you email, text or write a letter, there’s no wrong way to open up to loved ones. Writing your feelings down might also help you more clearly express yourself if you find them too difficult to talk about in person. You won’t have to see the other person’s reaction if you’re anxious about it, and you can outline your expectations and emotions concisely so your loved one can easily understand. Do what you can to get help, even if you don’t physically meet up for the discussion.

4. Talk to Someone You Trust

Telling someone about your mental illness can feel very intimate, which might make you feel uneasy about the idea. However, if there’s a person in your life who you can trust, go to them first. It can be incredibly relieving to open up to someone you know will not criticize you and will listen without judgment.

The person doesn’t have to be a family member or friend if you’re uncomfortable. It might be a co-worker, a teacher or a guidance counselor — just try not to keep your feelings bottled up. You deserve help in this situation, and talking to a trusted mentor or friend can help you feel less alone.

5. Reach out When You Feel Comfortable

Talking about your mental health can seem intimidating. To aid the process, reach out when you feel most comfortable. For instance, you might feel better discussing your challenges with loved ones when you’re going through a depressive episode. At other times, you might feel better discussing issues with a mental health professional or a stranger on the end of a helpline. There’s no right or wrong approach as long as you take steps to ask for help.

Also, know that you don’t have to share everything. Before meeting up, decide what you’d like to discuss and aspects you’d feel more comfortable not discussing. Set boundaries by being clear about when you want advice and when you want someone to listen to you. Also, recognize that people will have their own opinions, so try to be patient when explaining. If they attempt to invalidate your feelings, gently remind them that you understand your feelings and needs best.

Reaching out when you’re comfortable and setting boundaries are among the best tips for talking about mental health, whether you’re discussing your concerns with family members or professionals.

6. Let Them Know How They Can Support You

Let your loved ones know if you’ve reached a stage where you understand your specific struggles and are ready for support. Many people are often unsure of the best way to help. They may care about you and want to encourage you but fear saying the wrong thing. Take the lead by letting them know how to support you.

Perhaps you need to share a crisis plan with a trusted friend or family member. Maybe you need to speak to someone about your mental health who will listen without judgment. You might also ask for concrete support, like help finding a mental health counselor or rides to appointments. Whatever it is, practice what you’ll say before to reduce your anxiety. Your loved ones can’t read your mind — let them know precisely how you’d like to receive support or resources that could help them understand where you’re coming from and how to respond.

Contact Merrimack Valley Psychological Associates for Support in Andover, Massachusetts

Telling someone about your mental illness shows immense courage. While it can initially feel intimidating, opening up to a trusted friend or family member can reduce stress and improve your mood. When you’re ready to speak to someone about your mental health, you have many resources you can turn to, from your friends and family to mental health professionals.

At Merrimack Valley Psychological Associates, we provide a welcoming, compassionate setting for you to open up about your mental health. Whether you’re facing stress in your personal or professional life or a condition like depression and anxiety, we are here to support you. Our mental health clinicians can provide evidence-based treatment methods and communication tips if you need help talking to loved ones.

Contact us today to learn more about our counseling services or schedule an appointment.